State of Mind When Written: Being a Black African Female, I’ve grown to become accustomed to expecting and without taking it for granted, male attention from my counterparts of similar origins. Perhaps so because that’s been my biggest circle of influence as far as my mundane activities are concerned. So when I experienced this unprecedented attention, I just wanted to capture it here.
Imagine yourself descending into what I’d call the couloirs of a hotel flowing into a grand reception area with a body of diplomats and well dressed professionals and guests each looking up intermittently as you make your descent. Leaning on escalator bars for support almost becomes a reflex act. Even though my friend and I were both looking really good, I assure you for a few seconds, my stomach pinched with slight nervousness. But that quickly changed once we mingled into the crowd. This was the Haitian Independence Day Celebration I talked about last week. I bring it up again because of a fond memory that emerged and carried through the week.
So while at that event, before I could settle in with the French atmosphere in the air, this gentleman, tall and suave walked right up to me with a broad smile and purposefully uttered these words, as I translate for the benefit of non-French speakers: “You are the most outstanding and distinguishing lady of the night”. A few more things were said which simply sound juicier in French. Now guess what? I don’t even care if the guy was lying through his teeth, that was almost like an espresso shot of tequila to jumpstart my evening. That’s like starting a car and going from 0-100miles in 60 secs! Naturally he got my attention. You can certainly say that experience played in his favor that evening. But as our little chat grew into a conversation, he kept saying all the right things. Complimenting big and voluptuous chicks (which by the way is where I fall), and comparing them to thinner women as “match sticks”. No offense here, but if you live in a world where 95% of everything on TV and Print is a favor of the slimmer woman, what’s 10mins of blasting them? I was on sky 9!
Needless to say, I got the first dance from him and we literarily owned the dance floor. What I haven’t mentioned so far is that this fine gentleman was a white elderly male. Listen, I’m trying to be politically correct here you know. But the guy simply had lots of personality and charm to his credit and was by far, the man of the night in my little world that night. For me, this was a totally different kind of attention. I’ve had a couple of young Caucasians males give me some attention in that past. For the Latinos, I’m getting used to it now. As for my Mandingo or Black brothers, I expect it okay! But if an Asian were to give me that kind of attention today, I might be a little shocked…no pun intended here. However, I’d equally and pleasantly so, be as surprised as I was when it came from my French Sr. – (a more endearing way of referring to him). My rationale on this in the next blog.
So to my blog readers, I’m sharing this because it was a totally new experience for me. It was fascinating and priceless to watch as Mr. French Sr. was blushing, smiling, flirting, complimenting, pulling wild cards on the dance floor with interesting moves and emitting everything that simply said, “I have a crush on you and I don’t care what anybody thinks”. It was the cutest thing I’d ever seen in a long time and a true confirmation of the fact that the heart never really grows old. People, I basked in the moment and I can assure you, the memories of that evening will last a while.
Mr. French Sr. and I will remain friends! Naturally….