That Place! My Haven!
Goodbye to My Yesterday
By dianeDaiga – 12/21/07
State of Mind When Written:
After a brief period of emotional turmoil and worry about the unknowns in my life and situational crises I’ve been facing, I prayed for guidance and a revelation from the Lord! This piece came to me as a calm wave to soothe my anxiety and provide answers to my quest.
So to all everyone who comes across this piece, I hope you would find your haven as I did mine.
Today, I welcome this new day, this new beginning and this new me!
Today, I say goodbye to my yesterday, the old me and my baggage.
Today, I carry with me, the good things of my yesterday.
Today, I celebrate something new, something deep, something profound.
Today, I rejoice for my discoveries of inner-self.
You know, I have come a long way. I have walked a path that so many have in different ways, but so few will treasure its lessons. It is these lessons that have propelled me to this new beginning. We are all given a new day for continuity or new beginnings. I have chosen the path of new beginnings with hopes of maintaining continuity.
I needed this because I have been let down, just as much as I have let others down.
Because I have been laughed at in the same way that I did others.
Because I have been betrayed, as I’m sure I have to some out there.
Because I have been disrespected!
Because I have felt dishonored!
Because I have been through trials!
Because I have been lied to!
Because I have been disappointed!
Because I have been wronged!
And surely, it was because somewhere along the line, I may have done most if not all those things to someone else. I was simply being given a dose of my own medication.
Oh, and it hurt so badly. Through it all, I cried so many nights.
But today, I choose to fault no-one.
First, I have forgiven myself for my own wrongdoings,
for my self disrespect and for my own mistakes.
And I have ultimately forgiven all those who hurt me…..
Knowingly or unknowingly!
I assure you, it’s a good place to be.
To all my family members who ever wronged me, I have forgiven you.
To all my friends who hurt me in various ways, I hold nothing against you.
To all those men who walked in and out of my life, you caused me pain,
yet even you, I have forgiven.
I have forgiven because it feels right for me.
Because it is good for my heart and my tomorrow.
It has healed me and brought me to that place.
So I have found that place.
A place of calm collectedness and fortitude.
A place where honesty is my only way out.
A place of self forgiveness because the love of self is primordial.
A place of joyful living because I am spiritually elevated.
It is a place of acceptance, for the things I can’t change and the ones I can change.
I have come to that place where I am just contented for my gift of life.
A place where you know that saying goodbye might not be such a bad thing after all.
A place where each stride marks a new beginning.
A place where I am no longer conflicted about my values.
A place of knowing where I uniquely fit in the larger realm of things.
In that place, I am celebrating the good from yesterday.
I am celebrating my family, simply because!
I am celebrating my new and lifelong friendships.
For teaching me through time what friendship and loyalty really means.
Because of you, I enviously desire more of our friendships everyday.
I am celebrating my fellow brothers who believed that respecting and treating a sister right was not a luxury but a right. I smile and pray for you for being visionary and gentlemanly.
And even for the brothers who couldn’t do right by me, I celebrate you today because you knew no better. But those experiences brought me to this wholesome me today.
I’ll tell you what though, that place is a good place.
Where fighting my battles means pacing myself and enjoying the journey while going at it.
Where getting to my destination is a certainty because I’ve convinced myself to overlook the natural challenges that I’ll face along the way.
Where getting there is not about how fast I got there, but about how efficiently I get there.
Where getting there is about whom I meet and how I affect or impact them along the way.
Because that place is about living meaningfully and purposefully.
That is a place where you know your dreams will come true for sure as long as you stay the course.
It is a place of resting assured that I will have an expected ending because He has promised me so.
That Place, I Call It My New Haven.